To Have Lost: A Romance in Text Messages

by Katie Fitzgerald

Ryan: Code red! Don’t be mad, but Professor Keegan knows we’ve been fake dating.

Charlotte: Seriously? What did you do? We were so close!

Nothing! She just… figured it out.

I told you you have no poker face!

Well, not everyone can be a master manipulator like you.

Ugh. There’s only two days left and we were in the lead!

We were barely ahead of Simon and Alexa.

The next round of questions probably would have done us in anyway. We barely got through round one.

You barely got through round one. I knew everything about you.

I know stuff about you, too. Just not stupid stuff.

Who cares where you went to elementary school? Except people trying to steal your security questions.

I can’t believe this. Maybe we can still convince her we’re dating.

We could say we had a fight, and you thought we were broken up, but then I forgave you.

Nope. Too late. According to the official It Couple contest rules, we’re disqualified either way. You can’t win if you break up during the contest.

Great. Well, I’m sure you’re thrilled. I know you think the whole thing is a stupid tradition.

It is. But I’m still sorry I blew it. I know you really wanted the prize money.

Well, at least you got what you wanted. I saw Savannah West looking at you when we kissed during the kiss-a-thon last night. She was so jealous. You could ask her out now.

And why would she say yes? Either she finds out we were faking and thinks I’m a liar, or she thinks we broke up and assumes she’s the rebound.

No good either way.

I could talk to her, maybe. Let her know the whole thing was my idea.

I appreciate the offer, but no thanks. I think my crush has been over for a while.

Really? So this entire thing was for nothing.

I don’t think it was for nothing. I figured out a few things.

Like what?

Well, you’re a lot better at karaoke than I ever knew. You totally carried our performance of “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart.”

I was in it to win it.

You were amazing. Also awesome? Your dancing skills. I had no idea you had rhythm. How have we never danced together before?

When would we have done that? You’re always in the library .

Not always. I’d probably spend less time there if I knew I could spend it with you instead. The past couple weeks have been awesome.

You do realize you can break character now, right?

You don’t have to say this stuff to make me feel better about losing.

That’s the other thing I figured out. I wasn’t playing a character, Charlotte.

Hey, you gave it your best. Just because you’re not the greatest actor doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get some credit.

No, I mean I wasn’t faking. There was no acting. I just did what I’ve always wanted to do.

What are you saying? You like Savannah. This was just a silly charade for a dumb contest and clearly, it was a disaster.

I’m saying it wasn’t a disaster. And it wasn’t a charade. Kissing you last night was real for me.

And this fake break-up is going to be harder than I ever imagined.

Ryan, where are you right now?

Student center. Why?

Don’t move. I want to say something too.

One hour later…

Hey. Back to your room yet?

It’s only been 3 minutes.

I’m just trying to be a good boyfriend.

Boyfriend, huh?

Is that not what that kiss meant? Or the hand-holding? I think when people lace up their fingers like that, it definitely means they’re boyfriend/girlfriend.

Well, we never did that when we were faking, I know that much.

Only because I was holding back. I can definitely stop doing that now, right?

I’ve already stopped. Like I said, you weren’t the only one with secret feelings.

So are you still mad we didn’t win?

Nah. It is a dumb tradition. Besides, there’s that saying. It’s better to have loved and lost…

I think that’s about break-ups.

True. But if I had to lose something, I’m glad it was the contest and not you.

Does that mean we can have another kiss-a-thon tomorrow?

Absolutely. And this time, we’ll both definitely win.

🩷🩷🩷

Katie Fitzgerald is the author of Library Lovebirds, an ebook collection of bookish romances, The Bennetts Bloom, a novel in flash, and Green Gloves, a royal romance short story, as well as two short stories published as ebooks by Nicole Frail Books: All Year with Anthony and Batter Together. Her short stories and flash fiction appear online at Spark Flash Fiction and Micromance Magazine, as well as in various anthologies. She is a 2024 Sparkie Award recipient for Best Romantic Suspense and a nominee for the Pushcart Prize and the Cupid Prize. A graduate of Vassar College and a trained librarian, Katie resides in Maryland with her husband and five kids.